Should you make a career out of your autistic special interest?

Greg Fuqua, Mona Kay, and Scot Simpson recently had a conversation on the Neurodivergent Connections podcast about Autistic special interests and Monotropism and I wanted to share my thoughts.

Greg was very brave to share his story about how he wanted to turn his art special interest into a job and that it ultimately lead to failure, suicidality, and a deep depression. I think everyone should hear it and learn from it and take it as a cautionary tale.

He concluded that due to the high risk of failure, a person’s special interest shouldn’t be their work.

I disagree. Here’s why.

I had a very successful career at Google for 13 years doing my special interests of art and web development. I came in as an intern but I had more expertise and skill in web development than most of my peers. This is because I had spent significantly more of my free time creating, learning, and building websites compared to my peers because I was so fixated on it. And my weird combo of knowing both art and web design gave me a competitive advantage which landed me the job.

I’ve since left Google to build my own business, PaperDemon.com. I have the privilege of being able to combine my special interests of art, gaming, and web development into building something niche for the neurodiverse community.

It’s stressful not making an income right now. I wont lie. There are many days where I ask myself if I should give it up and go back to a corporate job. But I love it, I have a clear path forward to profitability, I am confident I will succeed, and I know my autism offers me a huge competitive advantage. Most businesses fail because people give up. Most people can’t tolerate failure or persist toward a goal as much as I can. And I owe a lot of that to my autism.

Am I a work-a-holic? Most people would say yes.

Is that a bad thing? For me, I think not.

I love my work. When I create, I feel a great sense of accomplishment, and I believe I am fulfilling my life’s purpose and using my unique gifts to make the world a better place. Not only did I make a great living doing it, it also gave me confidence early in my career that I desperately needed as a person with very low self-esteem.

Just because there’s a chance you’ll fail, doesn’t mean it isn’t worth pursuing.

The real lessons are:

Failure is the price you pay for success.

Learn to expect and accept failure. Failure is a great teacher. Learn to overcome perfectionism, and that persistence and practice will eventually lead to success.

Did my passion for my business create conflict in my marriage? Yes. But I did all the things Mona recommended in the video and it still didn’t work.

I was 100% transparent about everything, we set a budget, and every year I came in at or very close to budget, most years I was under budget. But my partner ended up resenting me anyway because I could not meet his unrealistic expectations. (There were a multitude of other problems too)

I am now happily divorced. My relationship with my work is my relationship with my self and it is sacred. If my partner does not understand or support my work, especially after I’ve objectively proven myself to be very capable of succeeding, then they are not the right partner for me.

Also I agree with Scott’s perspective. I really wish I had known about my autism much sooner. I would have reached self acceptance earlier and not tried so hard to be what everyone else wanted me to be.

Great conversation and thank you for posting this Neurodivergent Connections! Watch the video “When Autistic Special Interests Help, and When They Hurt – Monotropism IRL“.

Transforming your fear into your greatest strength

I’ve been reading the book Fear Intelligence by Jacqueline Wales and wanted to take a moment to share it with you all.

I don’t know how its possible but it’s as if the author Jacqueline Wales wrote this specifically for me. I’m autistic, anxious, and ADHD and have struggled for a long time with fear of rejection, inadequacy, and uncertainty.

As a startup founder, I have been grinding hard to make my dreams come true and build the business and life that I want. But it has come at a cost of relationships and a great deal of fear and uncertainty. This book has helped me identify my fears and lean into them instead of avoiding them.

Anxiety can be crippling and I had learned from group therapy that exposure therapy helps to desensitize you to the fear. But this book sees it in a different way that makes way more sense and feels far more empowering and inspiring. That your fear is an opportunity and learning to lean into it will not just allow you to tolerate the anxiety provoking conditions, but to transform it into your greatest strength.

The book is very structured which works great for my brain. I like organization.

Each section comes with a bulleted summary and journal prompts.

I love journal prompts.

Journaling has been a great practice for me to help me process my emotions, focus on my goals, and grow.
Similar books are too bloated but I found this book to be much more direct and to the point. I don’t like wasting time.

I have made tons of highlights and keep going back over this book again to study and revisit because overcoming fear is a daily practice that will take time to fully internalize.

Some minor constructive feedback

  • There are times where it felt like the same stuff was repeated in a different way and it caused me to question if I had read that section already or if there was a mistake in the book. But I also understand repetition helps with learning.
  • There were also a few formatting issues in the ebook but it didn’t distract much from the reading. I think they are easy fixes.
  • A journaling guide that goes with this would be so awesome. (Like a PDF or web page) Something that has all the journal prompts grouped by section/chapter and reference chapter title and page numbers so I can go back and re-read the chapter.

If you find that anxiety and fear are holding you back from achieving your goals, I suggest you give Fear Intelligence a read.

Social Media learnings

Social media is frustrating.

6 years ago, I left Google to pursue my Paperdemon business full time. Various forms of social media including videos, image posts, live streams, and tweets have been a part of my regular day to day work. But I’ve often felt like Sisyphus trying to move a boulder up a mountain. Spending hours and hours every week creating content and posting to far too many social media accounts only to have little to no material results. Exoduces happen from older platforms, and new platforms keep popping up. When I’m finally starting to grow on one channel, an algorithm changes, and I struggle to regain momentum.

Even when I had a couple of videos go viral and get 1 million views, it didn’t actually produce meaningful results.

10K target audience views > 1 million viral views

But for the first time I actually have fucking hope.

For the first time since I started promoting the PaperDemon Art RPG and Art Community on social media, I’m finally starting to see results. And it’s not just on one platform.

In the past 3 weeks I’ve gained over 300 followers on Tiktok and 250 subscribers on Youtube. 🎉🎉🎉

To put this in perspective, it took me 6 years to get my first 1000 Youtube subscribers. It took me 3 weeks to get the next 250 subscribers.

That’s fucking nuts.

It was not luck. I had two videos in this time period get more than 10K views. Interestingly, the video that did well on Tiktok was not the same video that did well on Youtube. I’ve also had several other videos getting more than 1K views. These views have indeed translated into more signups on PaperDemon.com. I went from an average of 3 signups a day to 9 a day.

So what changed? Why am I suddenly doing better? What is it I learned or started doing differently?

I hired an expert

The first right choice I made was hiring a social media coach.

I’ve tried throughout these past several years to create quality content myself and learn on my own. None of the articles, classes, resources I consumed were enough to help me achieve meaningful results. I also tried to delegate to experts. Over the years I’ve hired four different people at different times to either assist or be responsible for my social media. Unfortunately, none of them could deliver any meaningful impact. And it cost me a lot of money.

But on tiktok I found an expert who actually has hundreds of thousands of followers who specializes in coaching artists who want to grow their businesses on social media. I reached out for my first coaching call and it blew my mind. They were super direct telling me exactly what type of content to make and what NOT to make, how to find trending content, and how to best promote Paperdemon. A lot of it was unexpected and very different from advice I had gotten before and different from what I’d observed others do. Then I got to work and made and posted the content.

I find this model of hiring a coach particularly compelling because it’s very cost effective. I can create the content myself, which is more impactful anyway, while having the right direction to help me achieve results.

I tried Tiktok

I didn’t want to do Tiktok for all the same reasons everyone else doesn’t want to do it. There’s concerns with the ethical origins of the company, addictive design of the platform, etc. And who wants to try and invest in YET ANOTHER social media platform when you’re already investing so much time in the others. Every time my friends told me to try tiktok, I told them no. But one of my friends finally talked me into it and I opened an account around July 2024.

I actually saw growth there quite quickly. I think its a platform that rewards you for quality content even if you have a low followers/subscriber count. I went from 0 – 800 followers in 9 months.

If you find a platform where you actually make progress, then the others don’t matter and you can shift your attention to the ones that work.

You can see what I’ve been making on Tiktok here.

I created mediocre content, then kept improving

“We all have 10,000 bad drawings in us. The sooner we get them out the better.” – Walt Stanchfield.

If you’ve read any resources on social media or content marketing, you’ve probably read “content is king.” I needed to create a lot of mediocre content before I could start to create good content. I have a lot of skills as an artist but I was struggling to convey my wisdom in a way that would work well on social media. And it took me a while to get comfortable being live and in front of a camera.

But also a big struggle I had was figuring out the right type of content to make. I had done long form tutorial videos on YouTube and those tended to do better than other videos but they took a lot longer to make. For short vertical videos I tried to do art reveals and time lapses because that’s what everyone else was doing. But I didn’t have much luck there. I also experimented with other types of videos like lore, featured art from the community, and many other things people suggested to me.

My coach suggested I do tutorials instead and they perform consistently better than anything else I make. I wasn’t making those because for some reason I thought tutorials would only work for long form, not short form. And another creator in a similar space to me said tutorials don’t work as lead gens. But it turns out once again I got bad advice.

And it makes sense why I’d do better with tutorials. I’ve been making digital art for 25 years and I feel very comfortable teaching and have prior experience doing it. I kind of have a natural talent for it. And it’s high value content for my target audience.

Short form videos are the most effective way right now for me to communicate to my audience and provide quality and meaningful content. And the fact I can create and post in one day makes me more likely to finish. I still have a draft for a long form video that I’ve been working on for four months that I haven’t finished yet.

Writing my video hook/title first before writing the script helps a lot with SEO. Having the tools to know what content is trending helped, too.

i think the biggest mistake I made is I was trying to copy the content that I was seeing. I figured these other people are successful with this type of content so I should make the same content. But that didn’t work at all. My coach had a much better idea for an effective content strategy.

another thing different I’m doing is promoting the game much better in every video. Either after the intro hook or at the very end. I’ve also done some videos showing the UI. Those havent done as well but may do better after I make some website upgrades. I still have more types of content I want to experiment with.

The order of operations

  1. Research trending topics, ideally evergreen, that are relevant to my target audience. TikTok creator insights or Tubebuddy for Youtube
  2. Choose a topic to target, then write the title or hook stuffed with target topics/keywords
  3. Write a script
  4. Record
  5. Edit (ideally using a good phone app, not a desktop app)
  6. Post
  7. Repost older videos that performed poorly but were good quality with tweaks to hook, intro, outro, etc.

I’m no longer doing a content calendar. This was something I used to do but it’s not working for me at the moment.

I find that I often come up with ideas that sound great in the moment and the ideas just pile up in a graveyard and never get executed because another idea came along or my perfectionism got in the way. Currently it works best for me if I act on the idea when I have it and finish it (or mostly finish it) same day or next day and post within 24 hours.

Mental wellness

I’ve read from multiple sources over the years that the key to being successful on social media is to be “my authentic self” but actually executing on that has been a challenge for me.

A big problem was my mindset. I couldn’t show up authentically because I was too anxious and afraid to do so. Self confidence has been a struggle for me for all of my life. And unfortunately, that lack of confidence was showing through in my videos.

Earlier this year I made some big changes in my personal life and I restarted my Miracle Morning self care routine. These changes helped me do a complete 180 on my self confidence and mindset. Visualization through journaling has been the most effective technique I’ve been using. Most days I journal using prompts related to healing, manifesting, self confidence, and visualizing the future.

This primes me to have the confidence to show up in my videos.

Investing the Time

Another huge factor was the time commitment. To do quality short form videos it takes me anywhere from 3 to 8 hours total to do SEO topic research, draft a script, record, edit, and post (and repost to other socials). Art tutorials are on the longer end. And if I recall correctly, this 23K views video took me a whole day. I’m currently posting 3 per week but my goal is to work my way up to one per day per my coach’s recommendations. Realistically I can only do that if I figure out a way to make content faster or effectively reuse old content.

Because of my family responsibilities, I struggled to find the time to dedicate to this alongside my other time sensitive responsibilities. I was providing part time childcare for my son and also had frequent interruptions throughout the day for family obligations. I now have reliable child care Monday through Friday, I’ve recently found myself with a lot more time to work and dedicate to the business and keep up with the demanding social media schedule.

And the more content I create, the faster I can fail and the more I learn.

I’ll keep going and see where this leads.

I have more I could say on the topic but I’ve got to get back to manifesting. If you find this interesting, let me know and I’ll write more.